Name:Tim Country:United States State:Texas Metro:Fort Worth Gender:Male
Interests:Everything Expertise:Helping people in any way I can, sleeping, playing music, making people laugh Occupation:Self employed musician and Cle Industry:Entertainment
Everything in my life is going great. My finances are stable. As are my emotions. My walk with God is progressing. But still. Over the course of the day today, i began get frustrated with everything and everyone. Ive felt really lonely lately. I came to realize I need a vacation. Therefore I am taking one. There is aspects of my life i just need to get away from for a few days. Nothing bad. I just need to get away. I havnt taken a vacation in almost a year and a half. I was gunna take my best friend but she cant go and I came to realize i wana do this alone. I am not telling anyone where I am going or when. The only one who knows that I am going is Felicia. But I didnt tell her where. I will be leaving at some point on friday and be back on sunday. The only people who I will be answering my phone to is my family and felicia. Later.
A time in my life has come to pass where friendships are fading. By that I mean my friends are becoming divided and I don't want to choose sides. I'm speaking broadly of course. This is happening with many friends of mine I love everyone. I mean that whole heartedly. I do not want to choose between my friends and I won't. I don't want to pick sides either. It just sucks that all my friends started out so close to each other and stupid crap happens and friendships die. It drives me nuts to have to choose between people who want to hang out with me. Like one person wants to kick it @ the same time some one else does too and some one always ends up getting hurt because both people can't stand to be in the same room as each other. I wish things would go back to normal and everyone just get along with out so much hate.
Life is so short. Too short to hold grudges, end friendships, be cruel, or hate someone. This shouldn't be part of growing up. I am glad I have my few best friends who I know won't ever turn away.
Trent, Felicia, Pety, Michael, Will....I love you guys with all of my heart.
Music is one of my truest passions (the other two being acting and helping others). For years I have been playing music. It's in my soul. I couldn't imagine life with out it or with out being able to play it.
So many things inspire me to write it. Whether its my friends, family, love, heartache, God, or just life in general A lot of my music for a long time has come from heart ache but thats changing. I have been writing more about life and friendship. Its ben good. My writing has changed a lot and so as my music. Its been great. I love being able to write songs for my friends. They may be cheesey sometimes but its all from the heart lol.
Here are some excerpts lol
Kiss Me Kate (written by michael and I)
Kiss me Kate this could be our life Kiss Me Kate I'll make you my wife Kiss me Kate with those powder pink lips Kiss Me Kate I feel your finger tips
The Adventure (by me)
Lets run through the fields of sunflowers Run to the cliff and scream louder Life is beautiful The world is beautiful And so are you Run with me Lets run away 3, 2, 1
Charlie D & Pawnee B (by michael and I....lol)
I'll slap a ho when she's outta line Snortin' that K makes me feel just fine I'll blast a nigga if comes up in my place Glide my pimp hand across his face I'm Charlie D I'm Pawnee B
and it goes on from there.
Life is great right now. I have a new band...well two if you count the crap me, mike, dan, and will write.
I got my neeeeew phone!!!!! I went a freakin week without it. It drove me nuts not bein able to talk to felicia, michael, daniel, trent, and everyone else. I felt nude lol but i like being naked so it was all good. We had the theater banquet and joel and I got the sko show done literally seconds before we showed it lol. It was well received lol. I am definetly proud of the work we put into it. After that we had an after party at lloyds. Got a little drunk which is always fun. And the most random thing happend. Sarah and I actually had a conversation lol. She walked out while me and joel were talking and was talking to joel and I figured that was my que to go inside like i usually do then she started talking to me. No idea what she was sayin. All I was thinking was "what the heck is going on. this is unusual." lol Then we talked stuff out and we are cool now and friends again aparently. Idk what happend. Im not gunna ask her. Im just gunna let it lie and except it for what it is lol.
A little later she got hammered and me and adi drove her home and came back Then the party died down, drama started and i jetted.
The next i chilled at michael and daniels all day and then went to rave to see narnia with felicia. Narnia = amazing. We got done with that and decided to sneak into Made Of Honor. Made Of Honor = hilariously dumb It was great gettin to spend time with her one on one for once lol. I mean who wouldnt wanna spend time with the ultimate bad ass?!?!?! lol (u are the bad ass, not me lol)
after that I went home Went to church the next day aaaaaaaand then when i think all is good.....bomb shell.
My second family takes me aside today and basically tells me I have overstayed my welcome. I completely under stand though. I am not part of their family in a literal sence but still it sucks. Luckly daniel and michael said i could stay with them until we move into our new apt in august. Regardless i would have places to stay.
I would just like a permanant home though. I havent felt at home anywhere in almost a year. A place that i can call my own. I had my own place for a while but I still never felt right there. I do consider anywhere in texas my home but I just want a place where I can lay my head and breathe easy and just call it my home.
I know it will happen come august. It just sucks.
Oh well. I am stoked that I only have 2 weeks left on my job. I am praying that i do get my job with dan and mike. The said I am getting it but its coming down to there wire here lol. I probly wont be able to do much for the next couple of weeks (other than the indian jones marathon and then to see the new one this saturday!!!!) cuz i need to conserve like a sober hobo. idk what that ment lol.
its all good. I have been through waaaaaay worse than all this bs. What definitly will suck is this week cuz I am bound and determined to stop smoking this week. Partly cuz I cant afford it anymore, partly cuz it is totally unattractive to girls, partly cuz it makes me a burden on everyone else, partly cuz i need to get into shape and live a healthier lifestyle, and 100% cuz it is stupid. I wish I had never started. It will be one of the hardest things i have ever done but luckly i have my friends....well my family (they may not be blood but they are my fam) to help me.
I am officially over her. It's weird not having feelings for her anymore. Like I dont feel anything for her anymore. It's different. I feel like...well i feel good! I couldn't be happier. I have my friends and family to lean on. All is good. It was a learning experience!
but still. I have this piece of me that wants someone. Someone to care about and share my life with. Someone I can get along with and have fun with.
I do that with friends anyways but still. I think you catch my drift.
There's someone out there. Its just a matter of time! lol For now, kickin' it with my friends is all I need.
Peace out to whoever reads this.
love,
timmy 2step
I love this video and the bad ass that sent it to me to cheer me up one day!!!! lol
